Author Archives: krissieo

Ohio by the River (Anne Stuart)

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So here I am at Jenny Crusie’s enchanted castle by the Ohio River.  I’ve had a lovely time, running away from my son’s breakup with a woman I love and an honorary grandson I adore.

And if that’s not bad enough, I now have one of those very rare, highly toxic fits of “I’m a failure nobody reads me my career

is over what have I spent my life doing why doesn’t anyone care I’m a loser so why don’t you kill me.”

They don’t come very often.  If anything I’m a little too blessed with a sense of my own brilliance.  I’m my own greatest fan, but that only makes sense.  I write the books I want to read, about characters I adore, in places I want to be, with character arcs I respond to emotionally, or else I wouldn’t be writing them.  So of course I love them.  And I go my way blithely assuming other people love them too.  Oh, not all other people.  But a good solid core of them, a core of them that would be much larger if someone would only figure out how to publish me properly.

But every now and then, very rarely, an evil worm invades my heart and says “you don’t matter.”  In the last couple of years I’ve gone to a number of conferences where no one has read my books.  I’m better known for my RWA antics than what I write.  The crowning glory was Saturday, when I went to a book signing and sat while dozens of people picked up the two lousy books I had there (we hadn’t given B&N any warning so we just picked the two Kristina Douglas’s off the shelf.  No new one in the store.  No Anne Stuart backlist).  And I sat there as people picked them up and set them down again.

Now mind you, they were fans of romantic comedy.  If I’d been signing with paranormal writers it might have been different.  But I suddenly felt so fucking superfluous.  Like my time had passed.  Like no one cared any more.

Which would be okay, I guess, if I weren’t writing the best books of my career.  If I weren’t so caught up in the stories I want to write that I can’t stomp away from the whole thing in a huff, much as I want to.  I was born to write, to tell stories, I’m hard-wired to do it, and as Barbara Keiler has said, it’s like being trapped in an abusive marriage.  You keep hoping things will get better and you love it so much that there’s nothing you can do.

She was talking about publishers.  I’m talking about the whole business.  The readers I think would love my books who really don’t care.  The fact that my almost forty-year career can be happily ignored by voracious romance readers.

I left the autographing table cheerfully, went into a corner, took a tranquilizer and read books on quilting.  It helped.  And eventually someone tracked me down with the two books and had me sign them, apologizing profusely for bothering me.

So, I forage ahead.  I will never, NEVER do another autographing. Fuck ‘em.  I don’t think I’m going to go to another conference where people don’t even know what I write.  It’s a drag, because I have so much to give, having been in the business for so long.  I’ll probably change my mind about that.

And the fact that the economic disaster that’s hit all writers has hit me.  I know it’s nothing personal — we’re all going through it.  But …

Ah, enough complaining.  It’s a blip on the radar.  Next week I will be Madame Trash Heap Explains it All, I will be Sister Krissie the Goddess, I will be Writer, hear me roar.

But for a very short while I’m going to sit here, all alone on the deck by the Ohio River, listening to the birds, and cry.

I’ve been told not to write posts like this one.  Not to let them see you sweat.  Act like a star and people will perceive you as such.  Well, that’s not who I am.  I can’t see how this will damage my career.  If my books aren’t good enough to withstand a semi-public fit of depression then they’re not very good and I’ve spent my life deluded.

Which I haven’t.  They’re glorious, and so am I.  It’s just gonna take me a day or two to remember.

 

Madame Heap and Rumpelstiltskin (Anne Stuart)

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Aha.  More questions.  One that I can’t answer — when will get a new Rohan or Ice book?  Not scheduled — right now I have four books lined up ahead of them.  With the ICE book, Dylan and Mahmoud and

 Izzy have to get old enough — they’re still in their teens.  And Brandon’s in Scotland in self-directed physical rehab while Emma is becoming a surgeon. So they’re all doing what they need to do before they meet and fall in love while I write other books.

Grrrr.  Sorry for the messy look — for some reason Writepress doesn’t like Storybroads and it will never do what I want it to do.

 

But I digress.  Second question:  Would I ever write a kickass heroine who can beat the crap out of the hero?  Well, in BREATHLESS my heroine just about kills my hero by whacking him with an oar and knocking him into an icy lake (she has to rescue him).  And Maggie Bennett was incredibly kickass.  It’s something I should play with again.  The thing is, I find physical strength in men to be very appealing.  But I also like women who can hold their own, and the idea of beating the crap out of an annoying hero is very tempting (and my heroes can be very annoying).  I’ll play with the idea.  Isobel was pretty kickass in the ICE series.

And now I warned you of my love for a certain green man.  The one problem with ONCE UPON A TIME is there’s no hero for me to root for.  Handsome princes are too boring, nice as Prince Charming is (I don’t even remember his name, only Mary Margaret’s name).  I just started getting invest in the huntsman/sheriff when they killed him.  Pinocchio is cute but wooden (chortle) and the Mad Hatter, while he has possibilities, doesn’t do it for me.

Ah, but Rumpelstiltskin!  Mind you, when he’s very green and speckled and sweating he’s kind of revolting, but I’ve always had a weakness for Robert Carlyle, ever since I saw him strip to Hot Stuff.

As always I can’t put a video clip of the Full Monty up, but trust me, he’s adorable as a stripper.  What I like about Rumpeltstiltskin is how cool he is as Mr. Gold, how elegant and evil, just as I love how batshit insane he was in the Beauty and the Beast episode.  I was already half in love with Mr. Gold, but give me a Beast and I am so there.  The man deserves his beauty and his son back, no matter what he’s done.  (Mind you, I haven’t seen the series finale yet — it’s on my not-tivo.)

So he’s my main man.  I’m rooting for him among all the handsome princes.  Am I alone in this strange delusion?  Next to Jim Cavaziel’s Reese he’s my favorite new character on tv (for lust purposes — I have a real weakness for the werewolf on Grimm).

Have you fallen in love with a tv or movie character recently?

Madame Heap Redux (Anne Stuart)

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Two questions (well, two and a half) questions this week.  First, on censorship.  Are there guidelines, etc. for writers when writing love scenes?

The best guidelines would be the books themselves.  If you’re wanting to write paranormal romance then in general they can be pretty racy, depending on the mood you want to hit.  They can be gloriously hot, like Jeaniene Frost, they can be more restrained, like Patricia Briggs.  They can be outright erotica.  Now fortunately (or unfortunately) I like all levels (well, I shy away from erotica a bit, but that’s a whole ‘bother subject and it has nothing to do with me being prissy or against erotica).  But in general you need to pick which form you respond to, and keep your level of sensuality in line with that.  If you’re writing a 6 book arc where the characters finally do the deed i the third or fourth book then you’ll have a lower level of sensuality (usually — Laurell K. Hamilton is an exception).  If they’re at it immediately then you’re going to have to up the action on the second or third book, give the sex a strong reason for being there since we already know how well they do together.

As for GAME OF THRONES, I don’t get HBO.  There was a free weekend before the new series started so I watched a bunch of episodes and got totally caught up.  Loved Peter Dinklage (but then, I always have).  My only problem was that I couldn’t find a love story I could like (though I like the one with Jason Momoa and the blonde, but I knew he died).  And I love Sean Bean and knew he died in the series too, so that didn’t make me feel too cheery.  At some point I’ll be able to afford HBO again, at a time when GOT is running, and then I might be able to catch up.

Amazon review?  I think they matter, though I hope people are able to see through the constraints.  If I want to try a new author I’ll choose the one with the highest average, though if I stopped to think I wouldn’t.  Something that had lots of 5s and lots of 1s is more my style — I like polarizing brilliance.  But it’s short-hand, and life is busy.

As for my own Amazon reviews, I know they’re subjective.  They seem to boil down to two main points.  !.  Anne Stuart is not for everyone and 2.  I am a God.

I like point 2.  Then there’s always the readers who throw the books against the wall, find the heroines TSTL, hate my heroes, etc.  In fact, I might instinctively distrust something that had too many good reviews.

Look up your favorite book and see if you agree with the comments.  If you find you tend to go along with Amazon’s reviews, trust ‘em.  The great thing about a Kindle (and maybe other e-readers) is you can download a sample for free, and you can decide for yourself.

Madame Heap requires more questions, or else I will tell you why I find Rumplestiltskin the hottest man in prime time, or close to it.  I kid you know.

Madame Trash Heap Pt. 2 (Anne Stuart)

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Madame Heap returns, with more answers to your questions.

First, pen names.  There are a number of reasons for them.  For a long while Harlequin/Silhouette insisted that authors take pen names.  They dropped that, but quite often long term authors will take new names when they go into a new genre.  It was at the request of Pocket Books that I take a new name for the paranormal series, and I’m always interested in trying new things.

But Jayne Krentz has used her Amanda Quick name for historicals for decades and it seems to work well for her.  Barbara Mertz wrote gothic romances and romantic suspense as Barbara Michaels and archaeology-based romantic suspense as Elizabeth Peters.  Occasionally the lines blurred, but she usually kept to that.  There used to be a prejudice against writers who were prolific, giving critics the idea that the books were slapdash.

Edith Pargeter wrote her medieval mysteries as Ellis Peters.  And of course Eleanor Hibbert wrote under many names, and for some reason I only liked Victoria Holt, not Jean Plaidy or Philippa Carr.  So in that case the division was a smart idea.

It can be a lot of fun to go in search of other names — you’ll find treasures you otherwise would have missed.   But it’s all marketing, and most writers have no idea why the marketing department decides to do what  they do.

Oh, and it’s about numbers.  If Susy Writer’s last three books sold badly, then the people who order books will order fewer.  However if it’s Susan Author she’ll appear as an entirely new entity, and not have to deal with numbers baggage.

Second, do I wrote to please an editor?  The short answer is no.  I have to write what I love, and if I think she’s gonna bitch about too much sex I’ll come up with a rationale.  Mostly though, I write it the way I want, and when I revise I try to look at it through his or her eyes and see whether there are ways to tighten it.  The editor who wanted less sex and humor had an excellent eye for some of my weaknesses.  But the bottom line is I have to write what I want to write, and then work it out later.

Number three, the ICE series.  Yes, Dylan and Mahmoud will each have a love interest, yes, Izzy will be one of them, yes there will be a bit of a triangle, I expect, and yes, everyone will have a role.  God, I love that world.

Number four.  Heroines.  So a lot of them are tall, blonde, and have a high IQ.  Well, the truth is, I’m medium height (was almost 5’7 in my prime but I can’t straighten my poor, messed-up knees).  I’m blonde (well, blonde and gray).  As for IQ, I managed to avoid having mine tested — I prefer blissful ignorance.  But I imagine it’s relatively high.

I like smart heroines.  I like scary smart heroines.  I always wanted to be taller (my sister was 5’11).  But it seems I’ve had a lot of red-heads as well.  I’m trying to think if there are certain actresses that work as role models for my heroines, but I’m more eclectic on heroines.  Interesting question, though.  I don’t know if I’ve done that many brunettes.  I think I need to start playing around with different types.

This is fun, and painless.  More questions, my darlings!

Madame Trash Heap Pt. 1 (Anne Stuart)

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Okay, the all-knowing Trash Heap here, answering your questions.  I only got two this week, and I gotta say you’re missing an enormous opportunity, given the time I’ve spent in the industry and my total lack of inhibition.  So I’ll add one of my own to get you going.

Question: I realize that as an experienced writer you likely have less revision requests from your editors, but generally speaking, what changes have you seen with editors? Are they more hands-on, less, more keen to have the book shaped towards specific trends…

I’m not asking about specifics, just generalities.

Many thanks.

Su

I haven’t had much editing in my life, oddly enough.  Actually one of my most recent editors has been much more hands on than I’m used to.  In the past I’ve always been resistant to editing that didn’t make sense for my vision on the book.  When I agreed I did it happily.  when it didn’t, I fought it.

But I turned over a new leaf and decided to be cooperative, and this editor sends me heavy revision letters, with some very good points.  I still suspect she might be wrong on some major things (like cutting love scenes and humor) but I go with it.

But in general I find that editors are just too damned busy to edit.  Which means, since they don’t have time, aspiring writers need to turn better copy in order to be bought, and experienced writers need to turn in tighter books or weak stuff will get out there.

Often the copy editor does more of the editing than the actual editor.  It’s not that they don’t want to, it’s that they don’t have time.

So it’s less rather than more.

 

Someone else asked if there’ll be any more ICE and Rohan books, and the answer is a qualified yes.  Definitely one more Rohan book — I left Brandon and and Emma separated and pining.  Brandon’s swimming in icy streams in Scotland, getting healthy, and Emma’s becoming a doctor.  All will be well eventually, but I need to take care of them.

And I want to write another ICE book about Mahmoud and Dylan as the next generation, with Izzy, Peter’s daughter, as a sidekick.  I’d have to fudge some of the timing, but damn, it would be fun.

So yes to both, whenever I can find the time to do them.  Not sure where they’ll be published — Mira has an option on the next Rohan book, but I imagine another ICE book would be direct to e-publishing.

 

Here’s  a question no one asked yet –

Is it easier or harder to get published nowadays?

I think it might be easier, though certainly harder to get a physical book through the Big 6 publishers.  But most of them now have electronic-publishing arms, where they want original stuff, and it’s a good way to get into the business.  And of course there’s self-publishing, but that requires a huge amount of effort.

The bottom line is that opportunity is out there, if you put in the hard work.

And one last thing:

Kristina Douglas’s newest book, WARRIOR is out this week.

Enjoy!
And give me more questions next week, or you never know what I might say.

Spring (Anne Stuart)

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It’s actually spring.  Even in the wilds of northern Vermont it’s spring, despite the fact that we had snow last week, and spring is a fabulous time for new beginnings.  I’ve got a new contract, Kristina Douglas has a terrific new book, the grass is turning green (or already been cut a few times if you’re further south).  It’s asparagus season, strawberry season (at least some places), the birds are singing … what’s to bitch about?

Well, we could always find something.  Being happy requires an effort — it’s much easier to worry or feel bad or bitter.  And sometimes it’s not so simple as making the decision to feel happy.  And it’s not your fault if you can’t break free from feeling bad.  Sometimes feeling rotten just takes hold and it’s hard to break free.

But walking outside is (literally) a step in the right direction.  Getting out in the sun, moving.  You’ve heard that a sound times, but Sister Krissie is here to remind you once more.  Feeling crappy?  Get outside.

Starting next week, I’m going to commence Madame Trash Heap’s Heap O’ Answers.  I used to call myself Sister Yoda, since I’m so almighty wise, but now I’m leaning toward the All-Knowing Trash Heap from Fraggle Rock, also known as Madame Heap.  I started writing my first book (the first professional book that was published, that is) 41 years ago.  I have seen everything, written almost everything.  When it comes to writing romantic fiction there is no much that escapes me.

So … your task, each week, is to ask me questions.  I know, you guys aren’t big on questions.  If it takes you a while to get into it I’ll come up with my own questions, but don’t leave me hanging.  Remember I answer everything, including tell you how much I weigh (which is easier since I’m currently losing weight).  I even put a picture of me in a bathing suit on my www.reinventingfabulous.com blog.  I’m ridiculously open and open.

So come on, come all, to Madame Heap’s Heap O’ Answers.  Coming next week.

Great books (Anne Stuart)

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I’ve been reading some great books recently, so I thought I’d pass the info along.  I’m not really into slash and burn reviews that highlight how clever the reviewer is — I’m much more interested in finding lost treasures and new authors.  Smart Bitches is very entertaining but I seldom read reviews that aren’t at least a B+.  Years ago I sat next to Roger Ebert as he signed his newest book, entitled I REALLY REALLY REALLY HATED THIS MOVIE.  It was filled with his most dire pans, and of course I asked him for an autographed copy, but I found I didn’t want to read it.  I like glorifying the good things, not denigrating the bad.

So here, in no particular order, are my reading suggestions:

Meredith Duran has a new book out this week, AT YOUR PLEASURE, and if you haven’t read her, immediately glom onto her backlist.  She’s a fabulous writer, with fascinating heroes, strong heroines, interesting settings, hot sex … I mean, what more can you ask?  She’s definitely on my A-list.

Sherry Thomas is also among the best.  She’s coming out with a new one next month, as is the divine Loretta Chase.  Good times.

Teresa Medeiros, whom I expect you all know and love, has written a terrific book, out about three months now.  THE PLEASURE OF YOUR KISS is Teresa at the top of her game, and you’ll love it!

Patricia Briggs’s new book, FAIR GAME, is excellent.  Complex and nasty and sexy and wonderful, it’s a great addition to the Alpha and Omega series, about Charles and Anna.

I’ve been catching up with Lorraine Heath and her take of Oliver Twist.  The first one, IN BED WITH THE DEVIL, is delicious.  She writes characters who are a little nicer than mine usually are (hey, that’s not a hard thing to do), and the stories are intricate and involving.  Nice sex too.

A LITTLE NIGHT MAGIC by Lucy March is another treat, paranormal and romantic and warm and sexy.  Just a delight — I can’t wait for the next one.  (Full disclosure — Lucy is Lani Diane Rich, one of my sisters).

Connie Brockway’s THE OTHER GUY’S BRIDE is another treat which I happily devoured, both in print and in audio (love audio books).  A fabulous job!

Oh, and Molly Harper.  I had her confused with another writer whose work I hadn’t liked, but she’s great.  Funny but not in a strained way.  (Too many times so-called comic writing feels really labored to me).  I read her werewolf books first, now I’m back to her original vampire books.  Just great.

And if you’re partial to paranormal, probably my first full-blown paranormal (well, I’m not sure if that’s what they did) novella is just coming out in electronic form.  UNDER AN ENCHANTMENT takes place in Scotland, with a heroine who’s convinced everyone she’s daft and a hero who’s a selkie.

So go stock up on your reading material.  There’s a banquet out there.

I meant to put covers and links but my computer isn’t behaving, so you’ll have to go find them yourself.  Mea culpa.

Do you any glorious writers (all genres — I’ve got historical, paranormal and chick lit up there)?  Nothing better than glomming onto a new writer with a nice fat backlist, though I’ll take new ones who are fabulous as well.

Celebration Time! (Anne Stuart)

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First things first.  I am the proud recipient of a new contract for three historical romances with Montlake, the publishing arm of Amazon.  I chose them for a number of reasons.  Despite the obvious drawbacks (no books in the stores, etc) Montlake provides an excellent place for my creativity to nourish without having to obsess about placement and print runs and end caps and all the crazy things publishing does to you.  I can write my books and get them out there to the reading public, in print, as an e-book and as an audiobook (my personal favorite) without all the crazy making stuff going on.  And I do need a break from the crazy making stuff.  I think I’m going to be very happy, and I couldn’t be more pleased.  To even have a choice in the publishing climate is an accomplishment, and I think this is going to be just what I need.

The premise is simple — three sisters in Victorian England have lost their parents in a mysterious ship explosion (their father was a ship owner) and not only are they left penniless, but they suspect someone was behind the

ir deaths.  There are three suspects, and the sisters decide to go into service in their various households to track down the guilty culprit.  The oldest takes a post as a housekeeper, the middle as an upstairs maid, the youngest starts out as a scullery maid but rapidly becomes a brilliant cook.  So we get a taste of Upstairs/Downstairs/Downton Abbey into all this, with seething sexual tension, dark, mysterious, possibly deadly men, steamy sex, violence and rock and roll.  Ooops, no rock and roll.  But lots and lots of fun.

In the meantime, my dear friend Kristina Douglas is coming out with her third paranormal romance, entitled WARRIOR.  It’s already gotten a 4+ Hot Pick at Romantic Times, and in honor of its publication Pocket Books is offering the first in the series, RAZIEL, for a delicious $2.99 an ebook at all the usual suspects.  We’ve got sex, we’ve got violence, we’ve got fallen angels who drink blood.  What more can you ask?  Plus, the new cover has the flaming crotch o’ death, which makes it doubly irresistible.

Enjoy!

 

 

My Brilliant Career (Anne Stuart)

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I’m at a crossroads, trying to decide on which offer to take for my new historical series, and it’s forcing me to re-evaluate everything.  Who do I want to be when I grow up?  Do I want to keep chasing after the brass ring?

Thing about the brass ring.  It’s made of brass, not gold.  It tarnishes, and hey, it was probably made in China and it’s both radioactive and really made of lead.  It’s always been just out of my reach, though my fingers have glanced across it a few times.  But once you have it, what do you do with it besides go crazy trying to hold onto it?

Enough of the analogy.  I’m tired of making smart business decisions that end up being not very smart at all.  I’m tired of going with a publisher who’s going to do fabulous things for me and then turns out not to give a rat’s ass once they’ve won the bidding.  I’m tired of playing the stupid games in the casino called publishing. (And considering that I’ve published with almost every major publisher and imprint, don’t try to guess who I’m dissing.  Some tried their best.  Some didn’t. Most of them meant well.  Some didn’t.)

I never understood how writers could quit writing.  I never could — writing is hard-wired into me.  When I don’t write I get restless and edgy and depressed.  When I write I rule the world.

So what I need is to find a place where I can write.  Where I can flourish creatively, be valued by people who care about the same things I do.  I don’t need a house who knows how to build authors — after 38 years I’m fucking tired of being built.

I need a place in the sun to pour my heart and soul into books, where I don’t have to worry if I’m not writing about nice small towns unless I want to.  By this time in my life I want to be who I am, write what I write, and I need a supportive place to do it.

Is that asking so much?  Maybe.  But you know, I’m going to make the choice based on my heart, on my gut.  My brain never got me anywhere when it came to business decisions.  For once I’m not going to make the clever choice.  I’m going to make the wise one, for the sake of the books, not my career or my bank account.

Because I’ve had enough.  Wish me luck.

Writing Exercises (Anne Stuart)

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Part two of my weekend in Syracuse.  I searched the internet for entertaining writing exercises, just in case I got tired of talking, which I didn’t (I never knew I was such a blabber mouth), some that I made up, some that I gleaned and are fairly common.  If you’re feeling stuck, or just need to loosen up your writing muscles, try these.

1.  Find a scene in something you’ve written recently, cut and paste it into a new document.  Then, if it was i third person, write it in first.  If in first, write it in third.  It’s an entirely different process.  I wrote almost half of the first Kristina Douglas book in third, then decided first worked much better, and I had a fascinating time noticing the difference in the voice.  Even if it was in her POV, when it’s first person it takes on a different tone.

I also did that with an old gothic of mine, turning it from first to third.  It ended up winning a RITA (Winter’s Edge).

2.  One thing that was suggested, and I will tell you NEVER (screaming here) NEVER take paragraphs from a writer you admire and rewrite them.  Too many people have ended up either accidentally plagiarizing the work or using it as an excuse.  Leave other people’s writing alone.

But here are the ones I came up with to write a book (one old, there  of mine).

First, and this is the old one, pick a favorite room growing up and describe it.  Don’t overdo, just use salient details to get a feel of time and place.

For the next three, you need a set (or several sets) of Tarot cards and the Worst Case Scenario cards.

Pull a card from the Tarot to represent your heroine, and then describe her.  It doesn’t matter if there’s a male on the card — use your imagination.  Or hell, cheat and draw again until you find a female, though don’t be too picky.  I’m not big on rules.

 

Pull a card from the Tarot to describe a hero.  Same thing goes if you end up with a seemingly female card.  go with more than physical descriptions of these two — we need background and emotion.  Write a mini scene.

Put the two together in that room.  And then draw a Worst Case Scenario card.

Write a scene using the three cards and the remembered room.

Fun, right?  And it means you get to go out and buy Tarot cards.

Apparently there’s an excellent book called TAROT FOR WRITERS by Corrine Kenner.   I can’t figure out whether to buy it for the Kindle or in hard copy, but I’ve heard great things about it.  Hey, shopping is fun.

Anyone out there use Tarot for writing?